[These sound files are all from Sammy’s original Lost Cave]

Grandpa: If you read the TV guide, you don’t need a TV.
[Listen (TV Guide)]

Sam: Got a problem, guys?
Edgar: Just scoping your civilian wardrobe.
Sam: Pretty cool, huh?
Alan: For a fashion victim.
[Listen (Fashion Victim)]

Alan: Notice anything unusual about Santa Carla yet?
[Listen (Unusual)]

Alan: Yeah, you think we just work in a comic book store for our folks.
[Listen (Comic Book Store)]

Sam: I told you, I don’t like horror comics.
Alan: Think of it more as a survival manual. There’s our number on the back. And pray you’ll never need to call us.
[Listen (Pray)]

Alan: Santa Carla’s become a haven for the undead.
[Listen (Haven)]

Alan: Does the sunlight freak him out?
Sam: Uh, he wears sunglasses in the house.
Alan: He’s a vampire all right.
Edgar: Get yourself a good sharp stake, and drive it right through his heart.
Sam: I can’t do that, he’s my brother.
Alan: Ok, we’ll come over and do it for you.
[Listen (Vampire)]

Alan: Kill your brother. You’ll feel better.
[Listen (Kill your brother)]

Michael: Sammy! Open the window.
Sam: You’re a vampire! I knew it!
Michael: I am not.
Sam: So what are you, the Flying Nun?
[Listen (The Flying Nun)]

David: You’ll never grow old, Michael, and you’ll never die. But you must feed.
[Listen (Never Grow Old)]

Sam: You drank someone’s blood? Are you crazy?
[Listen (Crazy)]

Lucy: This is my son, Sam, and Edgar and Alan… Frog?
Edgar & Alan: *grunt*
[Listen (Frog?)]

Edgar: Where’s Nosferatu?
Sam: Who?
Edgar: The Prince of Darkness.
Alan: The nightcrawler. The bloodsucker.
Edgar: Au vampiro.
[Listen (Nightcrawler)]

Alan: Vampire hotel!
[Listen (Vampire Hotel)]

Edgar: Right now they’re at their most vulnerable.
Alan: Easy pickings.
Edgar: I guess we’ll just have to kill them all. We’ll start with the little one. First come, first staked.
[Listen (Easy Pickings)]

Edgar: Goodnight, bloodsucker.
[Listen (Goodnight)]

Alan: We don’t ride with vampires.
Sam: Fine, then stay here.
Edgar: We do now.
Alan: Yeah.
[Listen (Ride)]

Sam: We definitely blew Plan A.
Alan: Then it’s time to activate Plan B.
[Listen (Plan B)]

Sam: We’re on our own.
Alan: Good.
[Listen (Good)]

Sam: Death by stereo!
[Listen (Stereo)]

Alan: Totally annihilated his night-stalking ass!
[Listen (Night-stalking)]

[Sam & The Frogs]
Death to all vampires.
Maximum body count.
We’re awesome monster bashers.
The meanest!
The baddest!
[Listen (Death)]

Alan: Holy shit! It’s the attack of Eddie Munster.
[Listen (Eddie Munster)]

Alan: But you passed the test!
[Listen (Passed the Test)]

Max: Don’t ever invite a vampire into your house, you silly boy. It renders you powerless.
[Listen (Powerless)]

Edgar: Great! The blood-sucking Brady Bunch!
[Listen (Brady Bunch)]

Grandpa: One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach: all the damned vampires.
[Listen (Damned Vampires)]

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