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Guilty by autumn lyrical

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Guilty

Michael stared after the retreating form of his former lover, cobalt eyes that were previously filled with such emotion, now lifeless and cold. Words washed over him, harsh whispers of their confrontation, and the truth seemed to flow out from no-where.

He never loved her.

He knew it now, but he never acknowledged it before, when his dreams were plagued by a blue-eyed blond-haired devil. Tears welled up in his eyes as he remembered the look of betrayal on her face, his gypsy girl and the hurt in those brown eyes, eyes that seemed to draw you in.

I feel guilty
My words are empty
No signs to give you
I don’t have the time for you


Memories called unbidden, and Michael grimaced in recognition of all the pain he had caused. In shame he recalled David’s laugh, the self same laugh that had made shivers run up and down his spine.

He’d used Star, hadn’t even realised that he had. She had been the bait to get to him. Had felt the eyes of the vampires on him, that night when he was forced to watch their merciless slaughter of mortals. Almost couldn’t control the bloodlust inside. Why they wanted him he didn’t now, and he wished that the nightmares of their deaths would just vanish, disappear into the wind.

David had had a certain allure that Michael couldn’t resist. A primal attraction, and he knew that he had been totally clueless to it. He’d had eyes for Star. But his love for her was false and only now did he know it. Silently he cursed himself for his stupidity.

You say I'm heartless.
And you say I don't care.
I used to be there for you.
And you've said I seem so dead, that I have changed.
But so have you


He could have ruled the night, but he threw that all away. And he could not take the pitied looks from Sam or the concerned looks of his mom. A salty river of tears coursed its way down his face and the cold wind blew harsh and without mercy. His heart was heavy, surrounded now by an impenetrable wall of ice.

Guilty - Who-o-o-o-oh, guilty,
I feel so, Empty - Yea-e-e-e-eh, empty,
you know how you make me feel.


Michael frowned, the night now silent after Stars departure. What was that whisper that came from the shadows? That murmur that seemed to follow him in the dark. He felt guilty, that he had betrayed Star like this, betrayed David. Betrayed them all.

A whisper on the wind sounded strangely like his name and he sought out the place from whence it came. Startled by the sudden gust of wind he turned to face the devil from his dreams.

Before he could say a word a gloved finger was placed over his lips, cerulean eyes gleaming. Michael held his breath, almost believing that what he was seeing wasn’t real at all.

David’s soft voice rang out in the night and soothingly calmed him, tracing Michael’s tear tracks down his face with a gloved finger.

“I put a shield upon you. I didn't mean to hurt you. I would have only poisoned your mind. Never meant to make you cry.”

Michael’s heart beat in his chest as David’s voice washed over him in a wave of emotion. He closed his eyes, warmth echoing through him as cool lips met his own. He gasped as a cool heat rushed through him and only David’s arms around his waist prevented him from falling to his knees. But suddenly the torture stopped, and he felt like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water over him.

Opening his eyes he saw only the darkness of the night, and the lingering scent of the old flowers, petals spotting the ground with translucent colour. He sighed, wishing that he could turn back time, wished that he could feel once again the soft silky touch of his white-haired devils lips.

He’d known regret before, but had never felt this strongly. Regret that he wouldn’t see David again. Regret that he had unknowingly led Star on. A laugh filled the air that seemed so familiar it caused a pang to run through his heart.

“Who said that you’d never see me again Michael?”

So it wasn’t an illusion, Michael concluded. It was impossible that David stood here now. Impossible that the Lost Boys stood behind their leader, faces solemn, eyes fixed on him, waiting for a reaction of any kind. Perhaps they were expecting denial?

He must have voiced his amazement because David shook his head, slight smirk on his lips. “Not impossible Michael. Not for us.”

Michael gasped as realisation coursed through him. Their deaths were all a damn illusion. David’s smirk grew and he knew that he was right. Some of his guilt lifted, the weight of their murder lifted from his shoulders.

“You were always one of us, Michael. You know it’s true.”

David’s expression was so serious and Michaels gaze travelled over to gouge the reaction of Paul, Marko and Dwayne.

Strangely, their faces were welcoming. Paul was grinning insanely, though that was nothing out of the ordinary, nor was Marko’s angelic smile. But Dwayne’s look of acceptance was startling. The dark-haired brooder had never said more than a couple of words to him. How on earth they could forgive him for what he had done, he had no idea, and as David strode towards him and placed the ornate bottle in his hands all traces of guilt seemed to vanished from his being.

David’s eyes glittered, the sharp cerulean blue flecked with silver holding Michaels gaze. His lips curved slightly into a smile and he seemed to be paler than ever. His voice was soft, but Michael heard it clearly, and he knew the vampires intentions.

The bottle was heavy in his hands, the liquid inside blood red, and there was no surprise for that, as that was what it was. And as he gazed into the blue eye of the devil himself he knew he had sealed his fate.

He took a long drink from the bottle, savouring the coppery taste of the blood. David’s eyes were fierce and intense as he finished drinking. Michael took the gloved hand of his sire and the night was clearer. Sharper. He saw things in a way that he never would have before, saw them as if he was a newborn child- seeing the world for the first time. And it was David’s next words that brought him out of his reverie. His words that eased his mind and was more welcoming than he could have ever wished.

“Welcome back. Brother.”
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